Why am I Where Now?

I almost joined the army once. The police force too. Back when I first moved to Victoria I was scared, malnourished, and desperate. And with my university degree, i would start at some sort of officer status just involved in supply logistics. Fortunately Mike, my roommate at the time talked me out of it.

"Do you really want people telling you what to do all times of the day? Do you really want to wake up at like 5 o'clock every morning, and be involved in the slaughter of innocents?"

No I didn't, and I don't. It was easier deciding not to become a cop, because of the stigma of the social life of police officers. The average person doesn't like hanging out with them for some strange reason. Nevertheless, sometimes I still wonder what it would be like living my life that way, that is, pretty much the complete opposite of what my life is like right now.

While I will miss out forever on those experiences and where those choices would take me, I can at least use my imagination to think about it. That is what gives us a leg up on the other animals that don't spend as much time considering what if scenarios, and is also a curse when you can't make up your mind, maybe because you are contemplating too many possibilities.

And thats' what makes books, movies etc. so great. It gives you a chance to live a different life for a little while. I think it is some sort of release for our mind, not just escapism but having that moment of "aah it's like that, glad I'm not that guy" that might make you feel just a bit better about the choices you made that brought you where you are. It can also leave you wanting to give other people that experience, maybe a story of what if i had done this that nobody would have ever contemplated before, because it could not have even happened to them. It never happened to you either, but it might have.