John A. is not my homeboy, because he's nowhere to be found

This picture shows it all. Lady Liberty can find no ten dollar bills. Today I made two seperate purchases today, less than $10 in total value, and I of course paid in yuppy food stamps ($20 bills). Both times, I was given 2 5's, never a ten. I thought about it a bit more, and its true - tens are an endangered species. Is it just a mathematical anomoly, or some sort of Riplian coincidence?

This is the part where you expect me to do math about average purchases and what people tend to pay with, showing you that $5 bills are the only one worth carrying (you don't have to carry 20's because every schmuck pays with a 20 and so you end up having piles of these very quickly if you run any type of reputable business). I'm not going to do that though, because, really, most people pay with >>DEBIT CARDS<<

I hate debit cards. Sure, in the 1990's it was all the rage, people oohing and aaahing as they run the metallic stripe down the slider like some sort of flattened skinny penis. I guess people who didn't have credit cards wanted to know what it was like to 'pay in plastic' and next thing you know, we will soon be using magnetic chips implanted in our arms and eyeball scanners with built in GPS devices and enough explosives to terminate your heartbeat. But maybe now I'm being the romantic one. I guess the point I'm trying to make is, if you run a business, try to find some way to get a lot of 5's, because it seems like getting change after 5pm in the evenings and quite often on weekends is a pain in the ass.

And what the fuck are you supposed to do if someone is trying to give you money (ie buy something) and you can't change their bills? I guess you should have thought of that before your (insert witty type of shop) shop.